why being single isn't a bad thing
OK, time to get deep. I never really share this side of myself and in honor of the wonderful holiday that is Valentine’s Day (sense the sarcasm) I decided that I’m going to!
So, recently I discovered that I enjoy being single right now. Usually I am always hating it, wanting to find someone (someone GOOD), jealous of all my friends in relationships ,etc. Which isn’t a good thing or easy. So that needed to change and right now I am really loving being single. I haven’t had a ton of relationships in my life (I’m EXTREMELY picky and love my alone time) and the ones I did have were great until they weren’t. (Are all boys the worst?!) Through each one, I learned a lot about others and what I truly want in a relationship, and most importantly, I learned A LOT about myself. I am usually one of the only single girls in my friend group and before I couldn’t stand it. I was always wanting to find someone too, but now I just am not looking for anyone and am 100% okay with that. When I say not looking, I mean not actively searching. Like no thank you to dating apps, and also I’m not going to bars to meet people (not that I ever did let’s be honest), but you know what I mean, I think!
I know that my time will come and when it comes it will be better than ever and the wait will be so worth it. I know that I deserve the absolute best and I won’t stop until I get that. I know that God has that person in his mind and is just waiting for the right time to introduce us. I know he will be in my path soon enough and until then, I will be (patiently) waiting. I think it will happen as soon as I 100% love my life, love and appreciate myself and have established good, solid friendships, and just established in life in general. The happier you are with yourself and the more full your life is, the closer and more prepared you are to meeting your soulmate.
Now, let’s get to some reasons I have discovered that being single is actually one of the best things ever.
REASONS WHY BEING SINGLE IS GREAT
You can take care of YOU. I know that self-care is so big right now, but honestly it really is important. I love focusing on myself and making myself better and happier. I love finding what I really like in life and what I don’t like. I love discovering my strengths and weaknesses and working through them. I like having time to read my books, workout (or don’t workout, it depends on the week), cook healthy food (or eat frozen pizza), go on long walks alone, journal (I’ve become addicted to this lately), binge watch whatever you want, and just be alone and content. Key word there is content.
Focus hard on your passions. You can take the time being single to work as hard as you possibly can on your passions and then even harder. I have more time to focus on my blog and find new ideas for that at night instead of hanging out with someone multiple times during the week. I can do research on new ideas, find inspiration for content on Pinterest, write blog posts, pitch brands, sit on Instagram for hours uninterrupted, etc. You have so much more time.
You can do whatever you want, whenever you want. You can come home from work and lay in bed all night. You can go to dinner with friends. You can go home for the weekend. You can go for a girl’s weekend trip. WHATEVER. YOU. WANT. You don’t have to tell anyone else your plans or have to text someone constantly, or have to wait for texts back, the worst.
You have total control in where you eat, what you watch, etc. I’ve dated people who decide what shows they want to watch on tv, what movies they want to go see, where they want to go eat, where and when they want to go out, etc. Like, no. Girls have a say in this too and deserve to get what we want every once in a while as well. Right?? I have my shows that I like and watch (most people hate some of them, not my problem ;), and I enjoy watching them whenever I want. I also like specific movies so if I have to go alone, so be it. Honestly, I love going to movies alone. I also like to pick where I want to eat, and when I want to go out (which is rare right now, but not the point!)
You can spend a lot of time with your family. My family lives an hour away and I couldn’t be happier about that. Right now, I go to Athens almost every weekend, because there are games every weekend at the moment, but I stay there, cuddle with my dog, watch shows with my mom, take my sister shopping, etc. It gives you so much time to spend with them that you won’t ever get back. Plus, they are the reason I moved to Atlanta so might as well take advantage of the time while I can.
You can focus on friendships. When moving to a new city alone it is best to establish your friendships before a relationship. I love meeting new people, and spending time with my friends. I’ve met some really great girls since moving here and I couldn’t be happier about that. It’s easiest to build these friendships when you have a lot of time. Sometimes it is hard for people in relationships to balance both (I never really had the issue, but know a lot who do). Your friends matter the most in life, and guys are just there for the ride.
Less drama, less anxiety. This is pretty self explanatory. There is no worry about why he isn’t texting back or any of that nonsense. The drama and anxiety is out of your life and you can focus on better things.
You don’t have to act like you like other sport teams. Being in the family I’m in, I am VERY specific about my teams, and who I want to watch and when. I also cheer for certain teams and have reasons for that, or cheer against other teams and have my reasons for that. I also don’t want to watch a sport I have no desire to watch (soccer, hockey, sometimes baseball, whoops). It’s also nice to know you aren’t being used for who you are and who your family is and other connections that come with that…that’s a huge factor and something I’ve always had to be cautious about. Also, nobody wants to watch a basketball game with me ever…trust me.
You save money. When you’re dating someone, you are always going out to eat, getting drinks, etc. If you are dating for holidays, birthdays, etc you are spending money on gifts. Now, you can TREAT YOURSELF (which I do a little too much) and not someone else. Amen!
Overall, being single isn’t bad and if you are, you should embrace it and enjoy it while it lasts. Because you won’t be single forever (hopefully) and when the time comes that you meet that amazing person, it will all be worth it.